How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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