I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
