ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
