i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Is it penis luge time yet?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
