Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
