so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
