Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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