i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
