Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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