I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
