So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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