Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize
