drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
This house was built for laser tag.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
