no, he came in my armpit
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
In other news, I just burned my penis
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize