There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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