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Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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