I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize
