And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
