can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize