Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
