I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am