I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize