Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
What a dumb baby whore.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
