I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
