How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize