filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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