If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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