He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
