alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
