Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
