this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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