May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
