Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
