Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
