Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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