So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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