im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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