You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
