I don't usually arrange sex via text message
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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