Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
