Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.