Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
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