I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
