its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
