I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize