I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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