She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
