Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I can't put those talents on a resume
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
