My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about my life...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize