At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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