I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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