Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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